My mother-in-law knows about this site. She knows about my passion. She knows about my conviction. She knows how strong I feel about personal budgeting.

The other night we were talking about her situation many, many years ago where she was a school teacher raising three kids on her own. She certainly had it harder than I’ve ever had it. We were talking about something a little bit unrelated (prioritizing what you spend your money on, not budgeting per se, but more on that later) when she said something I have to take issue with.

Oh, if I had done a budget plan we never would have made it. There just wasn’t enough back then.

I’m sorry – come again?

Planning your personal budget is not going to make you have more or less money. I’m guilty of claiming that when you get on a budget, it’ll be like you got a raise – but you don’t actually get the raise. It’s just a perception thing.

At the same time, once you plan your personal budget, you’re not going to have less money than you did before. You will be forced to face reality though – whether that’s a good thing or not is up to you to decide.

But do we really want to live our life from paycheck to paycheck? Always wondering whether we can afford what we’re buying, and feeling guilty about it once we do?

Or, perhaps you’re on the side of the equation that doesn’t have an income problem. Are you avoiding the whole idea of a personal budgt plan because you will make it up on the income side? Do you really want to always wonder whether you’re really maximizing the resources you’ve created from work, skill, talents, creativity, etc.?

Man – don’t we all just work a little bit too hard to not think just a bit more about our money? Show a little respect for yourself and your efforts! That money that comes into your life is not waltzing. If you’re anything like most anybody, you have to drag it into your bank account kicking, biting, and throwing a fit. Money doesn’t come easy to most of us.

So why the heck do we let it boss us around once it gets there?

My mother-in-law worked her tail off to make sure her two little girls could have dance lessons. It was a priority. She made it happen. She tells me that a personal budget would have not let her give the girls dance lessons. No, NO, NO, NO. That’s not what a budget does! You tell it what’s important to you – not the other way around. Heck, what am I even talking about – as if the budget has some hidden agenda – it um, doesn’t care.

I’m sure a lot of us are familiar with Stephen R. Covey’s “7 Habits of Highly Effective People” or the book “Time Power”, or the other bazillion books regarding time management, balance, success, etc.

A lot, 90%, of those books have a common thread. They tell you to prioritize your daily tasks. Covey tells you to try and stay as much as possible in the “Very Important” quadrants of your daily tasks.

Why is it that every one of these time consultants says the same thing? Why do they all tell us to prioritize our tasks? As if that’s supposed to somehow bring us fulfillment…

It does.

When you’re doing the things that are truly important to you – checking off your list each day – you are happier. It’s just a fact of life – a law of the universe.

So it is with a plan for your personal budget. Think about it! It’s the exact same principle. You prioritize what your money should be doing. My mother-in-law was doing that with the dance lessons (I can’t speak to any other portion of her expenses, but with the dance lessons, we can be sure). They were important to her. She couldn’t technically “afford” them – but they were important so she made it happen.

A personal budget would not have disallowed the dance lessons. It would have simply enabled her to be a bit more methodical – a bit more on purpose with her money. A personal budget is a plan for your money priorities and nothing less. Don’t make it out to be the bad guy. Don’t make it out to be the one who’s at fault when things aren’t going your way. If your husband is spending all of your money on a suped up car, then you can be sure that is where some of his priorities lie. If you’re spending $150 on a haircut each month – well, your priorities are tangled up in your hair.

And the guy that retired at 55, never making over $55,000 – with $2.3 million in the bank? He had other priorities.